i am currently engaged in the analyzation of the spatial variations in physical,
biological,and human phenomena that occur on the surface of the globe and
treats their interrelationship and their significant regional patterns..
i also engage myself in reading a wide range of book classification,
i unwind sometimes with my friends in the friendly neighborhood joint with
yoca and sml to see us through... and on the side i am a certified dreamer
and poser!!! i can would love to be a part time party organizer...
i just love the details...
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Friday, February 04, 2005
NASA HULI ANG PAGSISISI..
totoo nga pala na sadyang nasa huli ang pagsisisi. i never used to believe in this saying. until wednesday. i guess most of the people around me already know all the crap that i went through my academic life these past years. i know i know my high school and elem/bahrain friends may not believe this but i have been slacking off in college, the ever grade conscious "debbie" is now officially a "bahala na girl". i guess i was too excited to try out new things, explore life, college life... there's the smoking the drinking, the clubbing and the tambays. (but no i HAVE NEVER EVER TRIED DRUGS) i just wanna make that crystal clear to the readers out there. that is probabaly the last thing in this world that i would try. i am content with my vices and am getting into a lot of trouble as it is. looking back last year, i guess it was a year of closure for me, a year of realization. i have always taken the right path or atleast the one my parents chose for me i do trust their decisions. but being stuck in that country where you are just so restricted and protected more like a jail for some, then finally coming here in the philippines, its like we were freed!!! free as a bird. especially without our parents around we can do things when we like it and just do whatever. i started college at such an early age of 15, yeah most of the people i've talked with couldn't even believe, they all thought that 15 was such a young age to start college, i mean they were right i was just a kid, i was not capable of making decisions that of course would affect my life as a whole like choosing my course etc. thus followed my academic delinquencies, i would fail my classes and loose interest in studying altogether, i lost my self confidence and my self esteem was at an all time low. ;( i was wrecked, i was so scared to face my problem and face my dad all the more. i was so guilty because my parents give me everything that i could wish for and all they were asking in return were good grades and it kills me that i couldn't do that. hahahahaha this sounds like an entry to malaala mo kaya.. i got carried away but making the long story short i made bad decisions and continued doing that believing that i would go to the pitts na. God must still love me becuase hindi pa ako na kick out ng UP!! and i am given another chance to straighten out everything. i have to be honest when i say that this is the only sem in my entire academic life that i am actually really studying as in no cramming. (oh alright i still cram but not as much as i used to). last wednesday my proffesor talked to me and offered me seasrep (south east asian studies regional exchange program). i was psyched!! i mean this is a great oppurtunity for me, not everyone is given this chance! but i had to turn it down sadly becuase it requires a good academic standing with a minimum average of B. i am so depressed, i wonder if i'll ever be given that opportunity again. this year it will be held in Thailand and it's an all expense paid trip i mean from the aitline tickets, to the tuition for the courses i'll be taking there, to the board and lodging and field trips. damn diba?? shet... i hate this!!! i want to go but i can't. and even it were offered next year, i might not also take it since i'm scheduled to do my summer field work then. so i have to choose betweenmarching in 2007 or 2008. but hell i wouldnt bother about that as yet. this has served as a wake up call for me too, and now i am all the more commited into getting higer grades and studying better. though my actions before disabled me from taking this program i am not hating myself for it. it was through these mistakes that i learned to be more mature and more responsible for my actions. i have learned the value of money and the value of people around me in short it made look at life in a totally different level. i am thankful!! who knows maybe a better opportunity is yet to come...
